Daughter speaks

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Daughter speaks

Postby Eldberg » Sun Mar 25, 2012 6:01 pm

My daughter is 3 years old and makes some fun comments.

Mommy: – No I can't read to you now, I have to go poo.
Daughter: – Good luck!

In car, approaching a town, daughter cries out "Many houses! Many houses!"
... brief pause, then:
"TWO!"

In church:
Priest: –The body of Christ.
Daughter: –Thank you very much.

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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby Saracen1970 » Mon Mar 26, 2012 12:10 pm

My litle girl is also three years old

The other day she ran past her mother and said

"Move Mum"

When stopped and asked to repeat what she had said

she replied "I said excluse me mommy, can you move out of the way?"
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby bboy » Mon Mar 26, 2012 1:19 pm

My friends wife was walking, with their daughter, into a supper market a few years ago (she was probably 2 years old at the time).

As they walked past the black security guard Kristen said "look mummy, a MONKEY", I think her mother wanted the ground to open up!!!
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby dundeemanonislay » Thu Mar 29, 2012 10:28 pm

Last sat our lodge celebrated our 50th anniversary and prior to the rededication ceremony provincial had asked us to do the 2nd degree. Having only been raised in nov and installed as a junior deacon in December this was my first big ritual in front of a large number of brethren and the nerves were kicking in and I had a fair but bit to remember and was practicing a lot in the house as you do ,

On the morning of the ceremony I was in the bathroom as usual looking in the mirror reciting my parts and heard some noise outside it was my daughter Eilidh aged 4 speaking to her older sister with concern in her little voice , telling her big sister "I think dad needs to go see the doctor and when her sister asked why , she said "cause he is always in the toilet speaking to somebody called the master,"
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby Eldberg » Fri Apr 19, 2013 12:34 pm

Daughter saw a big lorry which was transporting a tractor.

"Look! It has caught the tractor!

Then after a pause: "Poor tractor."

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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby MrBenn » Fri Apr 19, 2013 4:47 pm

MY son is 2 almost three - the other day I was about to start the bath/bed routine

Me - I'm going to run your bath now
Son - NO! You jolly well can't.
Me - Why not
Son - Because it is far too flumpy and you musn't

Sigh......I personally blame Thomas the Tank Engine - those trains are seriously rude!
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby Eldberg » Sun Apr 21, 2013 7:51 pm

Not being British, I had to look up the word "flumpy" and got this explanation:

"The act of performing oral sex on a male who is defecating into a toilet bowl."

I suppose this was not what your son meant.
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby MrBenn » Mon Apr 22, 2013 3:20 pm

Eldberg wrote:Not being British, I had to look up the word "flumpy" and got this explanation:

"The act of performing oral sex on a male who is defecating into a toilet bowl."

I suppose this was not what your son meant.



(5) - definitely need to use a different dictionary Brother!

I guess its a bit of a nonsense word, approximate meaning would be something that is both lumpy and floppy....not going to draw any comparisons with the meaning you found!! (2)
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby Eldberg » Sat Jul 27, 2013 2:03 pm

Daughter sees a big American cabriolet with the roof down.

"Look! They forgot to put the lid on."

Daughter sits down on hot car seat.

”Ouch, it fries!”
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby Simo6328 » Tue Jan 21, 2014 6:39 am

My wife left the house recently to go visit her father in hospital. as the door closed behind her my four year old son looked at me and said, 'Daddy, they won't like mammy in the hospital. She forgot to put her make-up on'. (2)
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby MrBenn » Tue Jan 21, 2014 10:57 am

We have a convertible - my son doesn't like it when I drop the roof tho - 'Daddy, you broke Mummy's car'
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby Eldberg » Sat Aug 02, 2014 10:29 pm

Last night.

Mother: Tomorrow we are going to get you father breakfast in bed.

Daughter: Becaus it's his birthday?

Mother: Yes, that's it.

Daughter: Can we bring in the Christmas tree?
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby Eldberg » Sun Aug 17, 2014 3:07 pm

Mother: Are you cute?

Daughter: Yes.

Mother: Who said so?

Daughter: I did!
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby MrBenn » Mon Aug 18, 2014 7:47 am

Boy is now 4 and the level of conversation & wordplay has gone stratospheric

My current favourite tho is

"Daddy, I am 100+ cross with you"
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby iduncan » Wed Sep 24, 2014 8:34 am

The one I always remember was my son coming into our room at night saying he had "fizzy legs", turned out to be pins and needles.
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby MrBenn » Thu Sep 25, 2014 8:17 pm

The other night on the way to the bedroom

"Daddy, I'm happy you're not dead"
"The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead."

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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby Eldberg » Tue Nov 18, 2014 4:19 pm

Coming home from school, daughter announced: "Today the whole class went to the blubblery."

Took a few seconds for dad to decipher into "library".

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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby Eckywan » Fri Nov 21, 2014 11:11 am

Two year old granddaughter on toilet seat
saw me passing by open door and said
Grandad sometimes its difficult to get your poo out !!


wait till shes 16 and I tell her / friends
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Re: Daughter speaks

Postby MrBenn » Fri Nov 21, 2014 1:00 pm

Must say I'm missing some of the lines he used to come out with
These days it's all about superheroes & baddies
"The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead."

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